Sisterly rivalry

Sibling relationships are so hard sometimes.  My two littlest get along so well - they are five days short of two years apart.  They play together, they have similar play styles - lots of imaginary play with dolls and all that (nothing like Lorelei, who was never really interested in dolls).  They fight every once in a while, usually because Violet has taken something away from Zoey or vice versa.  But generally they get along really well and are really loving with each other. 

Lorelei gets along with Zoey and plays games with her and is very sweet with her.  Lorelei and Violet are a different story.  If Lorelei is in the right mood she and Violet get along great, but a lot of the time she isn't interested in getting along with Violet.  She picks fights (fights the Violet doesn't even understand), she corrects Violet unnecessarily, she's mean and sometimes even cruel.  I've talked to Lorelei about it over and over, but it always happens again, sometimes just minutes after the conversation.  I've tried punishing, I've tried making her feel guilty.  But she just keeps doing it. 

I know, it's a part of the way kids are.  My mom says that I was the same way - I was the oldest and I was much kinder to my youngest sister than my middle sister.  But that isn't really very reassuring.  My middle sister had a lot of problems that she never really grew out of.  I'm not saying I caused those problems, but I probably didn't help them either.  I don't want that kind of dynamic for my girls.